How to Navigate Separation Anxiety in Young Children

At Little Learners Early Education in South Morang, we understand that separation anxiety is a natural part of early childhood development. It’s something many families experience as young children adjust to spending time away from their parents or caregivers. While this phase can be challenging, it also presents an opportunity to build resilience and confidence—important skills for a child’s growth and development.

Utilising our experience, here are some things we believe parents should try doing when dropping a child off for the first week of care:

Gradual Introduction

One effective way to ease separation anxiety is to introduce children to their new environment gradually. Before starting full-time care, short visits to the centre can help children become familiar with their surroundings and the educators who will care for them. These visits allow children to explore the space at their own pace, helping them build a sense of comfort and security.

Consistent Drop-Off Routines

Establishing a consistent and predictable routine at drop-off time is essential. Simple rituals—such as a special hug, a cheerful goodbye at the door, or a wave from the window—can reassure children that separation is temporary and that their parent or caregiver will return. Research shows that using a ‘goodbye ritual’ helps children feel safe and secure. Whether it’s a high-five, a song, or a drawing on their hand, a ritual can ease the transition and make goodbyes less stressful.

Communication and Personalisation

Every family is different, and every child adjusts in their own way. The educators in the room manage this process by working closely with families. Some children settle with a quick kiss and drop-off, while others may need their parent to stay for five minutes before leaving. The key is that educators—particularly the room leader—have discussions with families to find what works best for each child.

Orientation is an essential part of this process, allowing parents and educators to gauge the best approach for separating during drop-off. If a child is consistently distressed, the room supervisor will encourage a slow transition into care—Week 1 with shorter days, then gradually extending in Week 2 and beyond. We do not have distressed children here at Little Learners—we don’t allow children to cry all day. Instead, we keep parents in the loop and may ask them to collect their child earlier if needed. We encourage families to remain flexible at the beginning of their child’s care journey.

What Not to Do as a Parent

While separation can be emotional, there are certain approaches that can make it harder for a child to adjust. Here are some key things to avoid:

1. Always say goodbye – Never leave without saying goodbye, as sneaking away can create insecurity and mistrust.
2. Always say you are coming back – Reassure your child that you will return and provide a timeframe they can understand.
3. Don’t wait around for your child to cry – Lingering can prolong their distress. A short and positive goodbye is best.
4. Don’t sneak out or peep through windows – Your child may catch a glimpse of you, which can reignite their anxiety.
5. Show a strong, confident face – If you appear anxious or upset, your child may mirror those emotions.
6. Reassure your child – Use calming words to remind them that they are safe and that their caregivers will take good care of them.
7. Prepare for changes in routine – At Little Learners, we don’t rock children to sleep in our arms or carry babies all day. We encourage families to adjust these routines before starting care so that children won’t be shocked by the transition.

Building Independence

For some children, even small separations at home can feel overwhelming. Encouraging independence through small steps—such as asking them to play in another room for a few minutes—can help build confidence.

Staying Positive and Reassuring

Parents play a big role in shaping a child’s confidence. Maintaining a calm and positive attitude during drop-offs can help children feel more secure. Expressing excitement about their activities and friendships can encourage curiosity and anticipation.

When to Seek Additional Support

Some children have a more sensitive temperament and may need extra support. While some level of anxiety is normal, if distress becomes ongoing and severe, professional guidance may be beneficial.

At Little Learners Early Education, we are committed to providing a nurturing environment where every child feels valued and secure. By working together, families and educators can help children navigate this phase successfully, setting them up for a positive and confident future.